Friday, June 5, 2009

Soft Voices

Word count - 638

I stare through black squares

Condensation has gathered.

Glad to be here, yesterday looked bleak.

A burn so intense.

The fire continued all morning

Orange water is relief.

My distraction is concerned.

It’s not your fault, reassurance is necessary.

The tart taste helps.

Pink yellow and orange

Bright and beautiful but so very different.

Exhaustion has consumed.

A familiar feeling.

I see a locked bathroom door in black and white

What I fear most

My stomach in knots, a sick sadness fills me even while unconscious

It’s what keeps me from full trusting

It’s not real, the imagination has carried me too far

Vivid dreams are scaring me lately.

A walking disaster haunting my every move.

Although I have won

Thankful everyday for my good fortune

Rush through colors and time

A California sunrise has developed clear as if it’s happening this instant

A coyote runs across highway one in the southern most part of the state.

Only seconds after darkness falls.

A mansion on a hill awaits millions if visitors

Strange rooms with priceless things.

Belongings that will never be enjoyed.

Only looked at.

Zooming in the Arizona heat.

A tree with outstretched branches is an Elk.

Towering and watching.

I’m learning to breathe in these abundant skies.

A blanket of diamonds above.

The tree tops kiss the velvet blue.

I want to feel the chill

Dark clouds inspire

The thunder, is a comfort.

Scratches on your shoulder

From the strength that carries you.

A slight touch to the chin

Brings me to life

The mobile above sways.

A large cat in the bed swats and stares.

Easily entertained and laid back.

A paper chair

Should not be this intimidating

The sound it makes when seated makes my stomach flip

The missing 4

It makes me anxious

I want so much to be perfect

Nothing is perfect

No one is perfect.

I need it soon. Now.

A kiss on the ear, the greatest sign of affection.

An experiment

Would make most people nervous

Most would say no.

I trust.

I see the good.

It’s a great decision, consumed by you and me and everyone who should have done it.

No regrets here

Is that enough?

The doubt is crushing the air surrounding me

My dreams – are they far from the truth or close to reality.

It is only my fear.

My fear that does not emerge until I am closing my eyes

Smoothies in your new kitchen

An unexpected palace.

A swirl of strawberry, banana, orange and apple. A stumble.

My affection curls around your waist.

Voices carry

Like sailboats across the lake.

The lake I want to see.

So loud even through my closed window.

Irritated and tired, I close then I open.

I am exhausted one again.

I want it to be perfect. I cant screw up what I want to be exquisite.

Pushing onward it is good enough.

Frantically I weave my feelings.

A token to remember me by.

It seems endless, this night.

A hole in the wall

I wish it were frigid again

I want my space heater.

A flying distraction leaves me restless.

I itch.

All over.

I feel bad

About the snap decision.

I needed time, I did not utilize

Like I used to do, not always up to my full potential

Tying to change, I need to

For myself, my future, to gain the confidence.

The laughter echo is heard forever

A sting that no one knows about

You wont feel this rain, you never have.

I can’t let you.

It scares me to let you.

Contact lenses dry out my eyes that should be closed.

There is no rhyme or reason


I don’t understand how someone so organized cannot organize this.

Take your time it will happen.

Creativity flows but does not emerge.

Instead frustration erupts.

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