an end to begin

flatland mindfuck
what you make it
beauty.
behind childhood memories
but grown up girls need grown up things

look back on years unsettling
crush.
schoolbus kiss and
wish for invisibility

fifth grade copycat
tattle and
defeat.
neighborhood battles for
victory in pickup games and
birthday cake of ET's face
to celebrate

family vaca(y) on planes and cars and
boats sometimes
fishing on shores at eight when
one mile is an
hour.
not spent with
The Little Mermaid

flare jeans and nostrils at boys
new school
fresh.
faced fuck ups in waiting
pass notes in code
for BFF's and future
enemies galore

quick exits and small
talk.
mastered and reworked
just in time to
graduate walk and
don't forget to fornicate

start countdown to
reality.
semester one two and
three shots in
spinning face down
fairy tale far from
Mr. Disney

this past presents a
future of predictability without
a great escape
internal scrapbook dangling with
simple tests of
sanity.
for future me as
goodbye forms suburban epiphany

blink back
bittersweet.
tears fade as
distance gains
miles heading west
coast nears and
Illinois disappears